Mom and I were getting ready to leave for NYC in just a couple of days, and she got a call that dad’s oxygen levels had dropped. She rushed up there and was told that he was at the end of his life. So I scrambled to reschedule the trip while she called all the family.

Dad didn’t hang on long. He was gone by that afternoon. We are grateful he didn’t suffer long, and while we wish we could have all said goodbye, we know that he was ready.

It was a whirlwind after that. We had two days iced in at home, so it felt a little numb to sort of put grief on the back burner. But once things started melting, we had arrangements to make and then family started coming in.

We gathered all my siblings, dad’s two brothers, some of my nieces, my Uncle Jerry, my Hot Springs family….it was great to all be together. We told stories, we caught up, we laughed and cried.

Remi loved seeing everyone. She got snuggles and laughs.

She really bonded with my brother and she made him a sock puppet.

And we honored dad. We all went out to eat a couple of times- that’s what he would have wanted. He loved to treat people to meals.

His services were nice. We had a nice visitation with family and then our community showed up to support us, which was so wonderful. We had the flowers feature dad’s cowboy hat (complete with a taxidermy snake!) and his boots. It was beautiful.

The funeral service was very nice, too. We played his fave Willie Nelson, and our pastor gave a great message about the prodigal son. My best friends Brandy and Alden showed up to support me, which was so great to have them there. It really does matter to show up for your friends!

We had a nice lunch all together, and it was sad to see everyone go. But it was also nice to finally get some quiet moments to figure things out.

I wrote dad’s obituary. I’ll leave that here. We will miss him, but we are so glad he’s healed in heaven!

Roy Edward Selvidge, 86, passed from this world on Tuesday, February 22, 2022 in Fort Smith, Arkansas. Born on January 29, 1936, in Marked Tree, Arkansas to Robert and Alice Selvidge, Roy was the only boy for many years in a family of four (who he would say were ornery) sisters. Growing up during the Great Depression, he learned about hard work at a very young age. Roy spent his childhood picking cotton (for a quarter a day, he would tell you). He quit school in the 8th grade to work full time to support his family, but what he missed in formal education he made up for in life experience. Roy taught himself complex math on the job and became a skilled brick mason, carpenter, businessman and home builder. He left his mark across Arkansas and Missouri, building thousands of homes and owning multiple businesses. He was a member of Greenwood First Baptist Church.

Roy’s greatest works were his four children, Christie Selvidge of St. Charles, MO, Roy Selvidge, Jr. of Hot Springs, Paula Selvidge of Colleyville, TX and Brittney (Tyler) Lee of Hackett. Roy didn’t have many hobbies, but he did have many friends. He loved to host people at his lake house for a good barbecue and boat ride. He leaves behind a faithful wife of 36 years, Linda Selvidge of Hackett; his four children; brothers, Lester and Mike Selvidge; sister, Velma (Brad) Dillenback; several adult grandchildren, Ashley Garcia-Guevara, Brandy Ruffin, Cassy Selvidge, Darcey Selvidge; granddaughter, Remington Lee (age 5), plus many great-grandchildren. He was preceded in death by his parents, and his sisters, Mary Lou Barnett, Sue Austin and Bobby Winters.